boy under the wall

how am i supposed to paint a picture

of a boy under the wall

he was grinning too big or very set

like the theatre symbol

half smile half frown neither real

we weren’t quite sure what happened at home

but he moved out

and when his parents came with

he told them to go home

he tried so hard

hated so hard

to get things perfect — you know?

both the picture and antithesis of his parents

who i really couldn’t tell anything about

but who told a lot by the slap

on his shoulder

and the kind of eyes that tapped out dust

in the corner

you know? when he’s writing a letter to his past self

he doesn’t

pretends he doesn’t care

gets in everyone’s hair

then goes and cries under the wall

and we don’t know how to soothe 

the hurt in a boy from longset trauma

etching away at his mind

but boy

when will you let that wall come down?